NINE -- Shopping

Today was a great day! The family was together, we did some shopping and just enjoyed each other.

I want to talk about my Jessica. It used todos me run and hide, the idea of shopping with her, the meltdowns, the tantrums, the looks we would get.....ok well we still get those but they are not as bad as they used to be, and today she actually put things back. Reluctantly but still..... She has been making so much progress lately it's hard to know but I would say part of it is the iPod touch and the talking apps she loves so much. She will sit on the couch and think of things to say just to hear them repeated back to her. I love it!


So well today I am thankful for the iPod touch! Even though I really t bought we were kind of sort of using Jess' autism as an excuse to get it, it really has helped her in my opinion!

EIGHT - Sisters

Today Was Disco day in Jess' class  We got instructions to dress Jess in 70s attire . Most people who know me, know that I hate these special days when they are supposed to dress  in pajamas, or other such things KWIM?
Instead of stressing  over it, this time I utilized my good buddy Google Images LOL   I showed the girls what 70s fashion was like and I let them lose in their closet LOL  and I was really amazed, Moo loves clothes and fashion and she went to town dressing up Jess the giggles and laughter was awesome.


So Today I am thankful for Disco Day because I think it gave my girls a chance  to bond and become a little closer, Just look at  these sisters... I ask that you look NOT at the actual fashion but focus on the smiles :-) 

Seven -- forgotten

GeoTagged, [N42.60740, E71.30879]

So yesterday I forgot to do my 365

I have decided to do 365 days a picture each day of things I am thankful for. I started it on April first and here it is April seventh and I have already forgotten a day. Oh well, six out of seven ain't bad LOL yesterday was an awesome day so it would have been hard to put it all on one post.

Today I went to work out at the gym
My step toward a healthier life. It went well.


Ok speaking of healthy, have you tried this yogurt (see included image)
I tasted it and was instantly reminded of my mothers blueberry pie I mean really I had to look in the mirror and check to make sure I wasn't turning violet Violet. ;-)
Today I am thankful for a lot, but specifically Yoplait  blueberry pie yogurt! Thank you for reminding me that my mother made blueberry pie for me! I had forgotten!

Joined a gym - FIVE

I've been trying to eat healthy, and work out once in awhile but today we took a bigger step, we joined a gym. I'm really feeling like this was the right step for me and DH---Today was election day-we voted on our way to check out the gym. How amazing it is to be able to do that... No big deal hmm
they said about 20%. I could whine about that, but I won't.

So tonight I want to say I am thankful that I live in a country where I am free to vote or to chose not to vote, and have my say in the government.

school meetings -Four

I am Posting this entry on April 5th but I really wrote it on April 4th  it is number 4 on my 365 of thankfulness :-)  as soon as i post it I will then write my April 5 post :-)

Today we spent most of the day  talking about, thinking about, or dealing with My boy's issues we had the Eligibility meeting for an IEP  and I am not going to bore you with the details, but I thought today I would tell you that I am thankful For my boy. He is struggling so much right now his self esteem is low, his anxiety is high, he is so amazing, if only he knew how amazing he really is.

I did not forget the 365

I took the picture I just need to upload it...the computer has been otherwise occupied. LOL I'll have yesterday's and today's later today!
Thank you!

Friendship - Three

Tonight I want to talk about my son's friend Hunter. When we first met him we were not yet aware that our kids were on the spectrum, our boy Devin had recently been diagnosed with ADHD we had no idea what Jess' issues were.

Hunter was in the same Sunday school class as our boy and well they didn't get along so well. Every Sunday you could here me saying "if you can't get along with Hunter why can't you just play with the other kids" Boy was I one lucky mom that my boy didn't take my advice.

They are the best of friends! Hunter is such a positive influence on Devin. he convinced him to join scouts, to try new things, he encourages him when he needs it most!
but there is more to it than that
We carpool to scouts and it we pick Hunter up and I can tell you that all three of my kids look forward To that ride to scouts once a week. He gets into the car prepared with jokes for the little ones, and he treats Jess with compassion and understanding when she gets overwhelmed. He gives me hope! This is a kid I told my son not to play with an it turns out that he is such an amazing kid. I have hope that my kids are going to do ok.

So tonight I want to tell you that I am thankful for Hunter - his family is pretty awesome too!

Two --autism awareness

So today is world autism awareness day
So what's the thing I want the world to be aware of? I guess it would have to be. Sibling awareness! autism impacts every member of the family!

I feel like the world doesn't understand how much autism affects Moo, come on if you have siblings there must have been at least one time in your childhood where you felt that life was unfair. Imagine what it's like when both of those siblings have autism? I've seen Moo stand up to protect her sister, and I've had to sooth her when she has been the recipient of one of her sister's rages.
she is amazing really! she seems to have the ability to understand Jess when no one else does. And she gives up so much weather it's being quiet during homework time, or going with Jess' choice when they are fighting over what game to play or show to watch.

So here I am sitting at Wendy's with my family updating my blog via the iPod touch. And the thing I am thankful for is Megan my youngest kid who is anything but typical she may drive me batty at times but she amazes me even more!

We love you Moo!

Sunset

Testing

Can I post from the iPod?

the beginning-ONE

Today i am trying to start something new, I need to be more appreciative for all that I have, more positive, less negative, i also need to take more pics, it really is a favorite thing to do, but some days it's just hard.

Well now here I am On April 1st,  the fools day,  the day that starts the autism awareness month, the birthday of some really cool people, you know who you are :-) The day i got the evaluation report for my son, not an easy thing to read!

Alright I can feel crappy and still be thankful right?


So I thought I would start with a picture of Jess....OK it was late and I remembered that I needed to take a picture and Jess came in to finish eating her dinner...So I took her picture....see what a careful planner I am :-)





Number one,

I am thankful for you my Jess! Pasta sauce, freckles, ADHD,  autism and epilepsy all of the things that make you you!  I love the way your eyes flash turquoise when you are upset and bright blue when you smile, When you are working on your homework and you get the right answer Joy just flows from you! I love it when you jump, and when you giggle, then there are the moments when you need a rock, or when you need a hug and we connect PURE AWESOME!   I am so thankful that God has put you in my life!

Love and Pain

I
know
you
would
never
want
to
hurt
my
girl
I
know
you
love
her
I
Know
you
can
see
that
she
doenst
really
know
you
are
laughing
at
her
so
maybe
you
think
it
doenst
matter
She
Loves
you
So
Much
She
doesnt
understand
I
know
you
do
not
understand
why
you
should
NEVER
LAUGH
AT
MY
CHILD!



she may surprise you someday.

What I wish I could say to the person at the mall

Dear Woman at the mall with your absolutely adorable toddler boy,

My girls really enjoyed playing with your boy while you were not watching him while you were in line at the pretzel place.

It was fantastic watching my girls interact with your child, what a happy go lucky kid!  but I noticed my oldest girl cringe whenever he came too close to her, and I suspected you noticed this too, you came closer and started talking with me a little. I saw the look of concern, and  I suspected that you  might have thought she was rude, since my girlio was acting like a regular 8 year old  and her difficulties were not obvious at that moment, I chose to share with you that she has autism.

I was quite surprised at the abrupt manner in which you scooted your child away into the coffee shop, I wonder if you even noticed that you didn't get your pretzel. At first I was offended, imagine that!  I was worried that you thought my child was rude when you were the one who was rude, then I had flashes of anger and sadness while looking at my pouting kids who had just lost their playmate.

Now I just feel sorry for you, I don't really know anything about you, but I imagine you live in a closed up perfect little world. Dh told me to think back to the way I was before we had kids Ok so yeah  I used to be like you....I am a far better person now!  I wish you and your family well!  Us? we  have moved on,  our feelings are no longer hurt, we are a tough group our family!

It's Hard Having a Sibling with Special Needs

moo looking up
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

Yesterday when I picked Moo up from school she was very excited for me to open up her backpack, I found a puppy dog she made from cut out hearts, very cute! And a yellow envelope, she took the envelope out of my hand and pulled the report card out and handed it to me. My first thought was “argh why does a preschooler need a report card?” I knew it was good, her last report card had AC (accomplished) on everything except “Knows address” and when her brother found out he went to work drilling her on what her address was, so we know she has that covered. As I looked it over she was very excited and asked if I liked it, I told her that I was very impressed and gave her a high five.

I have to say that I really wasn’t all that impressed it was exactly what I expected, so as I drove home I was trying to figure out why a good report card for Moo didn’t give me excitement, as a good report card for her siblings would, am I a terrible mother for feeling this way? We try to treat all the kids equal and I have to tell you when you have a kid with ADHD and Asperger’s, and a kid with Epilepsy and Autism, and a kid that is NT treating them equal is HARD, but I imagine it’s hard for any family.
My mind goes back to when I was a kid and the resentment I felt with my brothers they were twins and a year older than me, they struggled with grades, and I didn’t. I remember feeling upset because they got praised more for their mediocre grades than I did for my good grades. I do remember when they passed the 8th grade and made it into the high school, as promised my mom bought them a stereo. Oh boy I had passed too but I did not get anything. I remember being so upset about it. there are a lot of “wounds” like this that have not begun to heal until now! Being a parent of children with special needs changes your perspective.




Maybe I am over thinking it a bit too much since she is only five, but I really need to make sure she doesn’t feel invisible like I did. How do you keep things equal? Any advice I can get on this is greatly appreciated.

The perfect Blog!

Why is it that I stop blogging?

even though I really want to blog every day and be this perfect blogger....
Well ive been thinking a lot about thhat this weekend and I think I have some changes to make.


Well I think it is because I have read so many good blogs....and I am jealous.


I WANT A PERFECT BLOG!!! I want the perfect message, the perfect grammar, the perfect spelling,the perfect poem,  the perfect images, I want the cute little stories that change people's lives ROFL


Now if you know me, you know that this is the silliest thing in the world!  I am far from perfect, I am so lazy about spelling and grammar, I usually have trouble getting my thoughts out properly. My ADD overtakes me and since I have such perfect blogs to read and want to emulate, I have anxiety about it.

So I am going to try something different.


I'm going to blog like I used to way back when I started
I am not going to try blog like others

I'll blog about whatever comes to my mind
it will be quotes, and prayers, and cute stories about how my kids have change MY life :-)
pictures, and of course I will b log about my adventures in the kitchen :-)
I also thought I would post links to various stories or blogs that I like here :-)

So if imperfect grammar bugs you please go on to the next blog, I wont be offended :-)

No more stress!

siblings

siblings
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

one of my faves
sadly it is also my most stolen pic *sigh*

Moo flowers

Moo flowers
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

about three months old Moo

Reading

Reading
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

looking at some older pics

I don't think it's the word!

Jess
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

Ok I have been all for the whole ending the R word thing
I really don't like the word. a couple years ago I was at Target with my family, it was Mothers day and my family gave me a shopping spree for a gift and so we had fun as a family picking out clothes for me, and we made our way to the dressing room. Dennis sat out with the kids while I went into the room to try things on and Jess was in her hyper happy mode, and it was so embarrassing, she was loud and obnoxious but happy, We were new the the world of Autism and I was just then figuring out that whole "pick your battles" thing, Hey she is happy let her have fun who cares who it annoys KWIM?
So while I was in the dressing room I was working through in my brain, listening to her and telling my self "who cares if she is loud" when two teenagers girls came in, I didn't see them, but I could tell they were teenagers they were giggling and I wasn't really paying too much attention then they got quiet while my girl got loud, and I heard it "Oh she is SO adorable!" said the one teen, the other said "who?" and she said "That cute little redheaded R*****ed girl" It was the first time I had heard anyone use that word about my daughter, I've heard it a lot since then and it never bothers me as much as it did that first time. It took the air out of my lungs I couldn't breath for a second and the room spun a little, then I was overtaken with a real anger I don't think I have ever felt before, How dare they say that about my sweet girl! I quickly changed into my regular clothes and stormed over to their stall in the dressing room and said "She is AUTISTIC!!!!" and I left them there. I just continued shopping, didn't say a word to the family.


I've always been bothered by my actions that day, by my feelings, that why is it ok for her to have autism but NOT the R word?
Well then the special Olympics came out with their campaign to end the R word and I was all for it!

Now I want to tell you about the evaluation Jessica had at School, in it the paperwork they repeatably referred to her having an "intellectual disability" No big deal right, that is what Autism is Right? When I brought copies of the papers to our Developmental Pediatrician She really had trouble getting me to understand what it meant, she talked about IQ, But I didn't really hear what she was saying, she talked about her being like an 11 year old when she is 18...I actually thought she meant socially, it wasn't until, in her frustration she said "we used to call it Mildly Mentally Retarded but we are not supposed to use that word anymore" when I finally got what she was saying. Since that moment I have had mixed emotions, I think back to that day and I don't think it does make a difference that my child is "the R word" having your child identified by their disability is hurtful. hmm I still leave myself some room to learn more here, maybe I will feel different some day.




The other Morning I was at the Grocery store, it was just me and Moo, the five year old,She goes to afternoon preschool. we needed to get some food and a snow storm was coming, I know a snow storm is always coming LOL I got to the check out line and there was a woman probably in her 50s ringing up the groceries and a teenager/young adult girl bagging, the bagger said to the cashier "so what time are you going home?" the cashier said "three" the bagger said "I bet you'll leave before that because you hate driving in the snow remember!" the cashier said "well it's not supposed to snow until tonight!" Then the bagger said "What are you mentally challenged? The news said it would snow at Noon!" I saw the sting of pain on the woman's face I was taken aback I said "That's not nice!" the cashier just changed the subject "Oh I should buy some of that ice melt before we sell out of it!" *sigh*

It's not the word, it's the world We need to change!!!!!!  We need to stop teasing people in general, but we need to stop teasing people by likening them to someone who has a disability as if having that disability were the worst thing in the world! We need to be nice to everyone!



Oh the older woman was right, the snow came later that night HA!

We interupt this blog....

hearts
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

haha So I promised to blog more, and to cook more and blog about it, but my fridge broke and the school snow days.....

excuses excuses

I've been working on a blog entry but the laptop froze, I feel like my kid Mapboy I know what I want to say, but I can't get it out onto my blog LOL


anyway we will be shoveling, I promised to to not write until I get the driveway cleared LOL

this picture was taken a few years back, the paper guy left these tracks after a dusting of snow......gosh remember that? when you used to get dustings of snow???


Ok off to the snow....