The awful Normals

J actually poses
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

I watched a movie last week called Phoebe in Wonderland
I wont tell you about it but to say that you should see it! It is on the instant Netflix.

here is a quote from the movie that I cannot get out of my head.

"At a certain part in your life. Probably when too much of it has gone
by. You will open your eyes and see yourself for who you are. Especially
for everything that made you so different from all the awful normals.
And you will say to yourself, "But I am this person." And in that
statement, that correction, there will be a kind of love." ~Miss Dodger Phoebe in Wonderland

remember when she had all the curls?

Messy had her very first school picture day today
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

This is J when she was in Kindergarten, since she cut her hair the curls have not come back, but....we are starting to get some curls back :) here are pics of her with the curls and the non curls, but we got a book on curly hair, and we do believe these curls are starting to make a comeback :)

a couple more layers

Tonight I went to the drug store to pick up My daughter's prescription. I pulled into the parking lot my brain thinking only about this being a step I had not thought of, My daughter is going to be taking a medication for her behavior, How much denial can you be in when your kid is taking medications for her autistic behavior, and Epilepsy? I pulled into the first empty spot, next to an enormous white van that towered over my mini van. I started to get out of my van, and I felt very uncomfortable, like that big van was going to swallow me up! I got back in and felt a bit silly about it, but I backed out of that spot and drove a little further into the middle of the parking lot where my car had no neighbors at all Silly I know but I told myself it would be safer to keep myself in full view....right?

then I went into the store, I usually like going to this store, it's open 24 hours so I like to go late at night and take my time perusing the isles, but this time was different....there right in the isle I was wanting to go down was one of those floor polishing machines, and the man was pushing it right toward me, and it was loud. My first thought was that something was broken on the machine and it was louder than normal, but I looked at the other people and they didn't seem phased. OK this must be how my kids feel, when they get overwhelmed by something that doenst seem to bother anyone else---I felt like he was going to suck me up in that machine, it was all I could do to keep myself from running away from it! WORSE was that he wasn't making sense, that man was pushing it up isle 2 and then he went over to isle 7, and then isle 4....I could not plan to avoid him and his loud machine! I tried to shop I was in the summer isle and checking out the bubbles I'm thinking my kids would love one of these big wands that makes the mega bubbles HERE COMES THE LOUD MACHINE....so I walk over to the section that has cups and pick up one of those ceramic coffee cups that looks like a disposable paper cup....Ive been looking at this for awhile, most coffee travel mugs are made of plastic and I just don't like drinking from plastic LOL HERE COMES THE NOISE MACHINE....So I go over to the magazine section flipping through First magazine to see if they published my picture....its sad really that they paid me for a picture but did not use it....why does that make me sad? I don't know I got my 100 bucks for it LOL HERE COMES THE NOISE MACHINE!!!! ARGH!!!!! That is it I am just going to go and get my prescriptions and go home Yikes there is a line and yeah here comes that loud machine again! "why is this not bothering you?" I wanted to ask the woman in front of me. I held my tongue and waited my turn, finally I got my prescriptions and I high tailed it LOL
of course somehow I bought some bubble stuff, a ceramic cup and a magazine, but HAHA maybe my kids do get their issues from me. oh did I also mention I got a bar of chocolate :) mmmmmmmmm

a slideshow of some of my DH's pics on flickr

J in may

J in may
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

Today I went and got J from school, the teacher had called and wanted to know if she was feeling sick, or had stayed up all night, that she was having behavior issues and now she seemed very tired, she told me she was having trouble keeping her head up and no learning was happening. as I drove I thought about how J acts after a seizure so I asked when I got there "did she act confused at all, did she seem cold and shivering, did she seem clumsy?" No they said but she had thrown a book at one of the kids and yelled at everyone repeatedly to stop talking, maybe she had a headache

*sigh*

I took her home and she slept all day and even slept in the car to pick up her brother at school.


now of course it is bedtime I'm not sure she will sleep.

I am thinking she may have had a seizure and no one noticed

why can't it be easy?

I cut My girl's bangs last night

She has been such a pill lately major meltdowns over things that don't seem to really be happening
The woman from the school, helped me write the list  with pictures of course depicting everything we were going to do, with a check mark for J so she can finish her list, and in the morning not have to stress about things like before....We had had a terrible morning where J had had a meltdown and took off her clothes and shoes and hid them, we ended up being late for school.  funny that I can chuckle about it now :) We had  instructions that we could not stray from the list, so when we picked up the boy from his friend's house we had to be strong about not staying longer :( 

but I forgot to include homework in that list, so when I tried to take it out and get her to do it....

 anyway totally my fault *sigh*
we had to get  back on track :)    dinner-dessert-bath  then she saw an ant that upset her, she seems to be the only one who is still seeing ants  but she got a sponge and started scrubbing the table I told her that she had to stop cleaning the table and I went back to combing her hair then later I was helping Moo with her hair and J went in and dumped the bottle of dish soap onto the kitchen table, I guess to clean away the filthy ant,  I don't know but I sent her to her room, which sounds like a punishment for her but it's not,  it's more designed to give me time to try and figure out if what she did was just because she didn't understand or if she was being bad KWIM?

So anyway I decided that she just didn't understand and called  her down and had her sit while we looked for ants that we could not find, and we talked about why using dish soap is not going to keep ants away and that she was not to use the dish soap any more.

But while we were sitting there I realized that her bangs go past her nose, that I have been putting off cutting her hair because I want to find someone who knows how to cut thick curly hair and make it more curly and less thick and easy to manage LOL  so I asked her if she wanted me to cut the hair away form her eyes and she said "yeah"  So I cut her bangs, which is not easy she squirms a lot LOL

but she can see now....wouldn't it be nice to find out that she was being a pill because her hair was in her eyes and bothering her> HAHA






 I'll post pics later

mapkids

mapkids
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

April 2 hiding behind red

April 2 hiding behind red
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

April 2M and D

April 2M and D
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

April is Autism Awareness month
We all dressed in blue today
It was also Good friday!
there was no place to go to spread awareness :)

the weather was beautiful we played outside
cleaned up the yard a little
Life is good!
Sunshine is good!

we talk about the meaning of Easter
I wonder if I am doing a good enough job leading these little ones to God .
Happy Easter Everyone!

moo in piggy tails

moo in piggy tails
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

a new shirt

a new shirt
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

I finally got the boy the shirt he wanted :)

not supposed to feel this way but....

Somedays I'm ok with everything, but sometimes...a child that is J's age catches my eye, or does something that seems extraordinary and I realize that this is ordinary, what we have is not...

Or J's little sister does something that I can never imagine J getting to the point of doing...these things make me feel.....ah I don't know...I try to push these feelings aside because I know I am not supposed to feel this way....but sometimes it's just too hard.

Yesterday was one of those days We went to the Upwards basketball awards.  looking at all the little kids who play basketball and Moo asked when she will be old enough to play basketball...I told her that she has to be six and she pointed out to me that her sister is 7 and doenst play basketball yet.....So then we stood in the crowd and talked to a few people and was asked a couple of times about J playing basketball....she looks pretty typical when she isn't acting out.....so I had to explain to people I haven't seen in years that she has Autism and it was hard, because well to me it's obvious it seems kind of awkward saying it.

Ok so now I admitted how weird I am :) I have to tell you something J said this morning that was AWESOME!

When I woke up and opened the door to my bedroom J was standing outside the door, so i asked her what she was doing and she said :

"Today is Sunday.....The sun went across the sky....and now its morning time!" 

 

 

 

more on the Epilepsy front

Isn't Epilepsy a weird word?
We went to Boston Children's Hospital and got to see the Neurologist. He asked a boatload of questions about the episodes J has had. Now I have posted about them, and told all my friends and gotten the opinion of some of them that they are "Complex Partial Seizures" from what I have read I agree, but one of her Doctors all but convinced me that she probably only had some sort of inner ear infection.

Well we were right. according to this Doctor, who should know, that is exactly what they were. he did some examining of her and ordered some tests....yeah I cannot remember the name of the genetics test, I swear I should take a video of the doctors appointments so I could remember all the things he tells me, he uses those big words and I can't remember them LOL but also ordered an MRI and an ambulatory 24 hour EEG.

So we will have some fun in the next few weeks :)

Moo Foot Art

Moo Foot Art
Originally uploaded by dennisgg2002

Love it! taken by DH

what a nice day!

March 7th
It's midnight now so the day is over
18 years we've been Married
the weather was so nice today :) it poured out 18 years ago :)
Today we came from church and went out for a pizza the whole family :)
then a nice walk :) the bike path was busy with smiling people
my family had a blast today. :)

really I wanted to share my new header picture with you :) taken today by DH :)

Happy anniversary to us!

:)

a day of downs and ups

I was really feeling quite down this morning
sort of a sorry for my self down in the dumps/why can't my kids act like those kids/wish I got my trip to Italy kind of feeling! really silly but I would be lying if I said I didn't feel like it from time to time.

I must say that I have some great friends and family who without even knowing it cheered me up and made everything alright :)

so thank you!

Lets talk about the dreaded rotary

Rotary
–noun
a circular arrangement constructed at the intersection of two or more roads in order to facilitate the passage of vehicles from one road to another.

OK when you come up on a rotary you must yield to the traffic that is already in the rotary.
If you don't believe me, then just look at that sign right there as you enter, the one that says "YIELD"

Don't just rush in there without looking and hoping that whoever is in there will stop.

while I am at it, I would like to say one message for the ones who are in the rotary, if you see a car entering the rotary, please do not freak out and slam on your brakes putting in danger the lives of yourself and whoever is behind you in the rotary! do not yield to them, it gives them a false sense of superiority. makes them belive that they should plow on ahead, when in fact they should yield to you!

these are the reasons people do not like rotaries this is why they take out rotaries and put in ridiculous intersections that don't make sense!!!

there now I feel better!

Who cares? Who cares? WHO CARES?

Today while I was running errands and taking kids for lab tests and listening to the radio and they are talking about Tiger Woods, he will speak today, his fans are angry, he will speak today, who can't ask questions, in rehab...Ugh I do not care about Tiger Woods!

I thought in my head that I would post a blog about how the media is making me crazy about Tiger, who cares? why do they have to waste so much time talking about it.

but imagine my surprise while I was giving my insurance information to the receptionist at the Children's Hospital Lab when I heard the woman I was talking to say "Oh My God here is Tiger!" I turned aroudn expecting to see some little kid who may be there often and is popular wiht them, but I saw the big TV they had on the wall and understood. Some other woman there behind the desk said "Is he talking I want to see" it took every ounce of will power for me not to make a comment like "I don't know if he is talking, but I was talking!" OK I thought it in my head, but I was a good girl! :) it was amazing, all production stopped! everyone was staring at the tv! maybe the "media" is on to something, at least the people who work in the lab care huh?
OK well finally I got the woman to take my information and went to the waiting room, luckily I sat next to a very nice lady who distracted me by talking about her life and her son who has Aspergers and ADHD! I find it amazing who God puts in your path some days :) ! got my girl's tests done, exchanged emails with the lady and got back in my car to hear all about Tiger again finally I just put in a CD. I do not care about Tiger Woods! All day long I have heard nothing but Tiger this, and Tiger that! Who believes him, who is hurt by him, who was there to hear him speak , who was not...WHO CARES?

let the guy go on with his life, and let the rest of us who have lives move forward! LOL

Really I would much rather hear about ice dancing.

Ok stepping off my soap box.

D and M

D and M
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

a better picture, but not as good....if you know what I mean!

D and M 2

D and M 2
Originally uploaded by machris (Mary-Ann)

he was playing the keyboard for his little sister :)